Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay: Challenges in working on Araby

While my co-author works on Cathay, I look to the south and ponder how to deal with Araby and the Southlands someday. One of the issues with Hams and covering that area is that, well, Araby mostly only existed for the Crusades to exist (and if you look at my writing on that, you know

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay: Challenges in Working on Cathay

Cathay is not easy to write about. Part of the reason you haven’t seen as much material on them here is that there isn’t as much to work with, but that’s only half of the problem. Not only is there an awful lot less official material, but Cathay differs immensely from Actual Historical China in

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The Incident: Imrik, Miao-Ying, and Mistranslation

As alluded in the update on Dragon Princes, Prince Imrik caused The Incident with Cathay during a diplomatic visit to the great city at Nan Gau. The elves were discussing potential assistance to the Great Bastion’s defenses, possibly sharing some of their knowledge in enchantment and magical construction in return for better deals on tea

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay Fluff: The Creation and Design of the Halfling

The Halflings are unusual in being a Creation built during the Great Collapse. The Old Ones were desperately looking for anything that would be immune to the Great Beast, and so they produced the Halflings. Every single element of their design was created to help them resist it. They are incapable of doing magic, like

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Nurglites and Runoff

It is time to examine the Cults of the Dark Gods during the Industrial Period. While the conventional threat of Chaos armies has been lessened (though not eliminated, who knows what might change?) the cults of the south continue their work. In a period riven with social unrest and injustice, where the authorities are prone

Warhammer Fantasy Strange Journey: Update 3: Moving North

The team set out across the Norscan countryside, picking through forest and tundra as the dogs excitedly ran about and sang the song of their people. There was no peace to be had with those dogs of burden, especially not with the summer sun shining down for most of the day and what should have

Blood Bowl: Season 2 Team Profile: The Golden Songbirds

Remember how Friedrich the Thrower was always rescuing forest animals? Well, after the season, he rescued a fox from a trap who promised to lead him to the golden songbird, as mentioned. Unbeknownst to everyone, when The Fox led the Thrower into the forest, he led him to the Golden Songbirds, a team of bizarre

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The End of the Shartaks

Humans and others called them the Dragon Ogres, but their name for themselves was the Shartaks. They were (like many of the native species of the world) a long-lived, partially reptilian race, with the unique trait that they never stopped growing throughout their lives. When the Old Ones came, they were devastated like all the

Warhammer Fantasy Strange Journey: Update 2: Tourism and Huskies

The story began with the arrival in Eydisheim. Fresh off the boat, Ilsa and Horst went to meet their two guides at a nearby tavern by the docks. It was there that they first noticed one of the oddities of Norsca: Mutants. Something that made Horst deeply uncomfortable, as many things during Strange Journey were

Warhammer Fantasy Strange Journey: Update 1: Introduction

                I feel like writing about Warhams more since I’m both running and playing it, so you know what? It’s time to start the Neutral Campaign. If Joan is the Rebel storyline and when you see her later, Simone is the Loyalist (Amazon) in the Old One plot, Strange Journey is the Neutral story. Uninvolved

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The Sword of Infection: The Tong

                “We are the Sword of Infection, the blade that spreads Chaos. Those who stand against us will stand no longer. Kneel or die.” Is a translation from Daemonic of the standard announcement that the Tong have taken the field. The Tong were long the most feared of all the Peoples of Chaos. Where they

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Chorfs and the Gears of Soldiery

Among the standard dwarfs, a profession of arms is an honorable profession for any dwarf, regardless of social station, gender, or age (so long as they’re an adult). Putting your nose to the grindstone on the battlefield and bravely standing in defense of the Hold is something to be proud of. From a young beardling

Warhammer Fantasy Thoughts: Undead Rock

Warhammer Undead are one of its standouts. Whether it’s Blood Bowl, the TTRPG, the wargame, or the fluff, the Undead consistently put in great work. They have variety, they have interesting gameplay, but even more importantly, they have personality. That personality is the key to why they end up working so well. Warhammer Undead and

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Greenskin Biology and Social Structure Basics

Greenskins are poorly understood by the world at large because their biology works very differently to other sapient species. They were not designed like the many Creation species, nor are they original natives like the Dragons, Shartaks, and Fimir. It’s unknown if they are an invasive species accidentally carried here on the Old Ones’ initial

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Why Orcs?

Why am I writing about orcs and gobbos all of a sudden? Partly, Blood Bowl putting me in the mind of it after watching the Argonorks play. Partly I’ve been playing X-Piratez again and the Ubers feel rather Orky (and the Lokk’Narr are explicitly goblins). But more importantly, it comes from working on the Lizards.

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Bigness and Black Orcs

                The Chaos Dwarfs will tell you that they created the Black Orcs, a race of superior orcs who served as overseers for their slaves and eventually rallied them against the Chorfs in a great rebellion. They will go on and on about how contact with them gave some of their incredibly traits to orcs

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Da Gunz’ o’ Gork n’ Mork

The 2600s have not been a fun time so far for the orcs and goblins, though that might turn around soon. The world at large is happy to ignore them now, relegating them to the old stories about how Sigmar got his crown and occasionally celebrating victories by the Imperial Army over ‘orcish savages’. The

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Swordelfs

The canon version of the Swordsmasters is full of stuff about how they only find their true fulfilment when they’re slaughtering their enemies, since they need full speed combat to show off their skills, or how every individual Swordsmaster has a completely unique style but also they just start twirling their swords and advancing on

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Mighty Elfotype: The Asrai Highborn

The Highborn of the Asrai were members of families particularly loyal to Ariel and the Inner Glades. Being originally Ulthuani and not possessed of the same urge towards Republicanism as the Eonir, when Ariel was first establishing things after assuming her position as the supposed Avatar of Isha and Queen of the Asrai it never

Warhammer Fantasy Thoughts: The Big Red Guy Who Hits Things

I’ve been thinking about this lately, and I’ve come to the conclusion that while there are changes that could be made to make Chaos into the genuine, beyond-the-world cosmic horror the original authors like to treat it as, it’s probably for the better that it isn’t. While WHFRP owes a lot to Call of Cthulhu,

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Ratfight Lustria

The Skaven are the most persistent threat to Lustria, something the Lizardmen find a little confusing. These weird little rats didn’t even exist during the original invasion. Many of the defenses of Lustria are set up with several assumptions: Invaders from the Old World care about losses to some degree, and demons don’t but can

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Skinks: HOLA SKINKS!

“You have been born for the kindest of purposes. You will be a boon to your friends, and you will show others the way to the Great Plan. No matter what you face, never cease your eternal chase.” These are the words every Skink hears when they come out of the spawning pool. Unlike Saurus

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Saurus: You Will Find Your Place

“You have been born for the greatest of purposes: You will be a shield to your friends and a hammer against your enemies. You will stand in defense of the Great Plan. You will be one of the tools that mends the world, and in time, you will find your place.” These words are the

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Kroxigors: Ziggurats Are Cool, I Like Ziggurats

The simplest way to think of a Krox is the power loader scene from Aliens. Kroxigors were created as heavy industrial drones, even bigger and stronger than Saurus. They’re designed to lift huge stones, do huge construction work, pull up trees with their bare claws, and otherwise exert huge amounts of force right where it

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: State Your Name, Occupation, and Gender: Lizardman, Lizardman, and Lizardman

One of the ways the lizards are tremendously different from their neighboring humans is simple: They have absolutely no biological sexual drive. They can’t reproduce ‘naturally’. The spawning pools are how more lizards are made. They also have no native social conception of gender. The name ‘lizardman’ is honestly a little odd to them, given

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The Tree Is Generally Less Aggressive: Treemen

Treemen are generally far less aggressive than Dryads. They don’t like to be hasty, and smashing people to paste is hasty. While the Loren hosts the largest number of Treemen in the world, they live in every forest and jungle outside of Lustria. Yes, jungle; you can run into jungle or rainforest Treemen in Kuresh.

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Drycha the Branchwraith: The Tree Is Extremely Aggressive

Drycha the Branchwraith is one of the reasons to assume the Tree Spirits are sapient, unlike demons. If the elves and Ariel truly had control of the Tree Spirits, it’s very unlikely any would act like Drycha, who has constantly been a thorn in their side (very literally). Some say she was corrupted by defeating

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Norse Dwarfs

The Norse Dwarfs are unusual folk. There’s a wide variety of them, as a surprising number of holds managed to survive the long separation after the frog-born volcano and earthquake incidents that ended the original dwarven empire. Dwarfs are tough folk, and they resisted the supernatural plagues of the north better than most. Not only

Warhammer Fluff Post: “And with that, Deathmaster, I leave-leave you prepare.”

                The Deathmaster. A title they made up specifically for Snikch. Normally, it’s hyperbole to claim someone is one of the most lethal individuals in the world. Not so with Snikch, the most famed of all of Eshin’s silent killers. Some of his most daring kills include Valten, the supposed avatar of Sigmar, Nurglitch during

Blood Bowl: Commence Dubstep

It’s time for more Blood Bowl talk, after the glorious debut of Akhorne the Squirrel. I feel this little ball of adorable floof and hate epitomizes Blood Bowl’s mixture of the ridiculous and the strategic, and his appearance in one of our league Challenge Games was extremely memorable. Akhorne is a Star Player, a hero

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Divine Astroturf: Elven Gods

The Elven Gods are somehow more numerous and ‘detailed’ than the human ones, and yet feel far less organic. Part of this is because the humans are generally the focus of WHFRP and the majority of its material. But we’ve chosen to incorporate that into the Old One plot in a very specific way. The

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Character Profile: Morghur the Mutator

It is not known who Morghur was. He was yet another unimportant Creation. What matters is what happened to him. The terrible champion of the Beastmen known as Morghur the Mutator seemed to defy all reason, followed by a warping aura that ruined the world around him. Beastmen were drawn to him, even as being

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Sigmarite Hell, The Weirdest Place in the Realm

Sigmarholle, Sigmar Hell. A strange place within the Realm of Slaanesh, founded by a mischievous and later rebellious Daemon Prince with a very curious Mutation. After all, daemons have Mutations too to represent unusual changes in their frames. He had Uncanny Resemblance, where you resemble a famous person perfectly. And so he came in the

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Chaos Marauder as a Career and how it informs fluff

Chaos Marauders are terrible fighters, far from much of their official fluff. If you’re going by their Career, they are inferior in almost every way to an Imperial Soldier, a Bretonnian Knight Errant, a Kislevite Streltsi, a Squire, even a common street Thug (itself not the strongest of first tier fighters) is better in a

Warhammer Fluff Post: Character Profile: Ganmir the Drake

Ganmir the Moon Drake serves alongside House Bergamot, a House that has relatively modest means and numbers, but an awakened Dragon. This alone made House Bergamot prominent as far as Caledoran Noble Houses go, but Ganmir and his former rider made it moreso. The great Dragon Prince Larandar was one of the few who behaved

Warhammer Fluff Post: Halflings in the 2600s, Basics

The humble halfling rarely gets discussed in the grand sweep of historical epic. For the most part, this is by design; the Moot is mostly happy to be the Moot. Halflings are heavily assimilated into the Empire to the point that most humans don’t notice them as anything unusual, much like dwarfs. The Moot has

Blood Bowl: The Heroes of Spielberg, the Spielberg Sheriffs!

The prosperous town of Spielburg is a small bit of cheer among the gloomy Grey Mountains of Wissenland. In the 2600s, it’s become a destination for skiers, hikers, and wealthy tourists from Nuln, coming up-state to witness the beautiful forests and picturesque mountain views and try new hobbies and sports like ‘hockey’, a game taken

Blood Bowl and Randomness: Nuffle is an angry God

‘Swingy’ games are usually regarded as games that have less strategy, less control, etc. Blood Bowl is a game that embraces swingy dice with low granularity in order to build the game’s strategy. I would also posit that this makes the game a better simulation of what it’s trying to simulate: The drama of professional

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff Post: Blood Bowl!

                So, I’m starting to get into updated Blood Bowl (which itself is a fascinating strategy game worth its own article on how it uses randomness) and I think it’s time to break some writer’s block by going into Blood Bowl in the 2600s. I’m sorry for the relatively sparse updates last week. Working on

Warhammer Fluff Post: WHFRP and Horror

WHFRP is a game that shows plenty of influence from Call of Cthulhu. The 80s in general were a pretty wild and experimental time for RPGs. One of WHFRP’s main adventure types is ‘investigate weird occult bullshit’ for a reason, though WHFRP characters are way, way more capable of smashing the weird bullshit’s face in

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The Reikstag: BUT WHAT OF PARLIAMENT!?

If you ask the average citizen of the Empire in the 2600s to describe the workings of government, they will shrug, say a few things about it working like Sigmar says, mention some of the local customs of governance wherever you are, and get on with life. Most of the Empire cannot tell you its

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Truck, Train, and Tank: Weapons of the Great Horned Rat War

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tpk3GU1OmTY Just perfect for Clan Mors Skaven showed up in the last storyline in Hams, and by God, I’d almost forgotten just how much I love writing for those little maniacs. Something about their manic energy and tendency to explode just speaks to me. Their constant failures are part of it, but another part of

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The White Sword, Redeemer of the Damned

The White Sword currently sits in the Imperial armory after its recovery by famed archeologist Wilhelmina Schmidt in 2527. It is one of the most bizarre magical treasures in the Empire, being as it was originally a Chaos Weapon of all things. An immensely powerful weapon forged for an Everchosen who, for some reason, did

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Organization and Marks of the Cult of Gundred

We spoke earlier about Gundred and his new position in the industrial age, but that does not tell you much about the growing organization of his cult. An elven character on encountering them in Talabheim in the 2630s expressed shock: 50 years ago, when she arrived in the Old World, they were just bands of

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Elves, Violence, and Soldiery

Elves and violence have a complicated relationship. Aenarion the Defender taught them to hold spears in a line in the first place, implying there was no organized Ulthuani martial tradition before the Collapse. There were elves who knew how to fight, but organized elven soldiery was only seen in Lustria (and did not survive, along

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Khemri in the 2600s.

Egyptology! It was a big and fashionable thing in Europe. However, in keeping with the fact that it’s surprisingly hard to be as plunder-happy as Europe was in reality in Hams, attempts to do ‘archeology’ British Museum style have traditionally run into a problem: The ancient Egyptians of Hams are undead sure but they’re still

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The Design of a Chaos Warrior and the Weapons That Kill Them

Chaos Warriors and Chaos Armor were originally designed for the War in Heaven. You’d think as a result that black powder revolvers and 19th century cannon wouldn’t be such a problem for them; they were designed to fight in a war that involved titans of biological and magical power who had impossibly advanced technology, right?

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The Long Road of the Ear Bill

                This came up in last evening’s game: When the protagonists arrived in Altdorf, they found a sight much like the Victoria title screen up above. People celebrating in the street after the passage of some major political reform. In this case, it was a bill to finally abolish and make illicit ear taxes, passed

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Hunters in the 2600s

                The Witch Hunters are undergoing another of their major changes in the 2600s, particularly after the Ordo Fidelus incident. Specifically, many Ordo Fidelus Hunters were found to be operating under the aegis of sympathetic nobility or officials, under the old laws that allowed local authorities to charter Hunters. As a result, those old laws

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The Failings of the Fall

Falling to Chaos. It is one of the classic setpieces of Warhammer. A priest, community leader, knight, exorcist, or whatnot has read too many evil books in the pursuit of facing the darkness, seen too many awful things, touched too many magic rocks, and now they’re a worshipper of the forces they used to fight.

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The Shadow of the Beast

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SuMZSoqqAoc (I absolutely knew what I was doing naming it this)                 The Shadow of the Beast came up in one of the stories about the Beastmen no longer under its control. It’s what some of them call the memories of their time controlled by the Great Beast; after all, most adult Beastmen who have

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Chaos Is Not Cosmic

Chaos tries to have cosmic horror flavoring. It does not work. Why not? Our Chaos is a cosmic horror, but standard Chaos isn’t. Part of the problem of a lot of attempts at cosmic horror is that they take cosmic horror as a matter of power, rather than flavor and concept. It’s very powerful and

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The Lesser Devastation of the Storm

The Storm of Chaos was a short, sharp war that did plenty of damage to the areas the forces of Chaos passed through. Except the damage it did was piddly (even in canon, where it’s hyped up as near-apocalyptic) compared to real-world 17th and 18th century warfare, and for a very specific reason: it was

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Hochland Arsenal: A new rifle? Loaded from the back!? Without a hammer!?! And it needs a new manual of arms!?!?!

Hochland Arsenal in Hergig is part of the province’s attempt to modernize its capital city, something that was briefly interrupted by its sack during the Storm of Chaos but that proceeds apace in the 2600s. Hochland suffered plenty in the Storm, but the most visible damage was to Hergig itself, being one of the only

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Amazon in the 2600s

Amazon is having a good century if you ask the plantation owners. As discussed in the Amazon Slavery update, plantation economies and slavery have become much more essential to the wealthiest in Amazon society since they began to open up to the world in the 2540s. The destruction of Mazdamundi and the re-ascension of Lord

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Myrmidianism in the 2600s

Myrmidianism is one of the major world religions. The Empire prefers Sigmarism, obviously, but they are just about the only ones who do; it is notable how little Sigmar is worshipped outside of his country. Myrmidianism, on the other hand, has had notably more success sending out missionaries and trying to preach in other lands.

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Flagellants, Friars, and Penitents

The Flagellant Orders of the Empire are something that has fallen in and out of favor over the land’s long history. Curiously, they are a primarily Sigmarite phenomena, something that has seen much debate over why among scholars and theologians. After all, Sigmar himself probably wouldn’t approve of wounding yourself constantly (seems a silly way

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The Lord of Murder, Human Edition

Khaine is in a curious place in human lands, not simply in the 2600s but throughout all of history. Khaine is a legitimate God, acknowledged as a God and with an open place in myth as Morr’s brother. He is also outlawed in every human society that acknowledges him. This is because while Khaine is

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The Empire in the 2600s

The 2600s are already being called the Imperial Century, primarily in Imperial circles. The country was the first to industrialize its economy, and it was already a large and wealthy nation; now it is reaping immense benefits (on the macro level) even as it sees itself riven with social injustice and unrest. Grand Cathay is

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Kislev in the 2600s

Kislev is not having a good century. Losing a major war with territorial concessions to an upstart Norsca was not good for them. It has done immense damage to the authority of the Tsar and there are whispers that he will soon be deposed, though the cleverer boyars have realized this is one of their

Narrative Theory: The Warhammer Crusades and the Value or Lack Thereof of Historical Analogues

Warhammer’s Crusades are one of the points in its backstory that just doesn’t work. Ironically, a big part of this is that the Crusades are played ‘straight’, with heroic knights lancing evil slaving Arabian villains to protect Estalia from being invaded by outsiders. The actual Crusades, being a complex mess of religious conflict, desire for

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Sartosa in 2600

These articles are basically ways for me to get my notes straight for what I’m running right now. It’s efficient! Anyway, it’s time for the pirate island, as that’s where the protagonists are headed right now. Sartosa has always existed as a semi-independent non-state, even for a Tilean state. It stands to the south-west of

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff Post: Sea Guard of Lothern, The Elf Marines

The Sea Guard of Lothern are unusual in being a primarily commoner professional military unit. The concept has been so successful that other Kingdoms employ units like them, but the Lothern Sea Guard maintain they are the original, with the longest tradition of professional service, and are generally regarded as the most capable and desirable

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Nurgle and the Weakening of Plague

It is not a surprise to a regular reader that I generally do not care for the Chaos Gods’ depiction in canonical Warhammer Fantasy (or 40k, really, but that’s a bit of a different animal). What may be a surprise is which one I dislike the most. It’s Nurgle. Of all the Gods, I can

Warhammer Mechanics Thoughts: Swordsmaster Testing and Instability

Hey is this a mechanics post about Warhammer instead of fluff? Why yes, it is, that’s how you can tell I’m actually running the danged thing again. Brought in the Swordsmaster class from kommy’s Chosen of Asuryan (we also have a Bard in our group game!) to test it some and because it fit a

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: The Dying of the Dying Race Concept

You may notice in Chosen of Asuryan and other works that we don’t really truck with the concept of the ‘slowly dying race of elves or dwarves’. The normal warhams fluff is full of stuff like ‘oh they can’t build this ship anymore because the only kind of magic tree it was made out of

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Ode to the Warlock

The Warlock is one of the examples of why WHFRP 2e’s Career System works so well. Introduced in Realms of Sorcery (which is itself a fantastic book, to which our Hams owes very much) they represent renegade dark wizards who have mastered a Dark Lore independent of any collegiate education or direct links to the

Warhammer Fluff Update: The Legacy of the Lie: Basic Concepts of Norscan Transcendent Belief

One of the most curious bits of religious thinking in Norsca is the old gnostic angle that they approached Chaos from. That it was the transcendent reality while this world was an illusion that you had to exist in to reach the throne of the Gods. That concept has remained in the background of much

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Norsca Economy and Foreign Relations, Basics

Modern Norsca is a very different place depending on what part of Norsca you visit. The southern coast is urbanizing, though only Eydisheim is a ‘true’ urban center yet, spurred on by the relative ease of communication and transit along the coast of the Sea of Claws. The interior is full of boom-towns and holds

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: Eydisheim, Center of New Norsca, Basics

I know, I have other things I should be working on (Mercenaries, Planet of the Blue Rose) but I’m running Hams again and this stuff helps me prepare and sort things out. Besides, the industrial period is fun. It’s time to talk about Norsca’s capital, the one major urban center in the country so far.

Warhammer Side Story: Joan d’Lyonesse and the Adventure of Puppets

This part was not the frightening part. This part was fun, in its own way. Joan sat at her small writing desk in her Initiate’s cell, working needle and thread on colorful cloth and stuffing. It had been frustrating at first. She was used to doing what she was best at. She was used to

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff Post: The Empire’s Worst of Both Worlds Problem

One of the interesting parts of Warhammer to me, as we’ve introduced nations like Norsca post-Swedening (I just like to use that term for it since they gave Kislev an ulcer. A bigger one), is that between them and the Amazons and Kislev you can really see something interesting pop up with the Empire’s relationship

Warhammer Side Story: Joan d’Lyonesse and the Adventure of the Constructed Nature of the Gender Binary

Weeks had passed and things had become routine. She liked routine. Get up. Do work. Eat something. Go to classes. Pray. Do work. Possibly wild party times at some point. The classes remained the hardest part. She liked looking for lessons in the chores and interactions with her fellows. She did not especially like sitting

The Tome of Salvation Repost, Post 2

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay: Tome of Salvation It’s all Tilean to me I admit the author’s ‘book within a book’ presentation gets a little annoying during the part on Tilea. The setting is never quite sure how disdainful the Empire is towards the other human nations, though it’s always clear they consider themselves the main ‘superpower’

The Tome of Salvation Repost, Post 1

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay: Tome of Salvation More the Empire book than the Actual Empire Book This is one of the biggest books in the game-line, only a slight bit shorter than the Tome of Corruption (which I believe holds the record for size). It covers everything you’d ever want to know about the orthodox religions

Warhammer Fluff Posts: A second excerpt from On the Matters of the Sword and Axe, on Khorne

In these days, when men have not seen the forces of Chaos south of the Wastes for a century, many misconceptions about the Gods spread. The most persistent of these is the idea that Khornates are honorable but brutal warriors, driven by their insane lust for battle. This misunderstands them completely. There are honorable Khornates;

Warhammer Fluff Post: An Excerpt from On Matters of the Sword and Axe

This is a bit of an experiment on writing more excerpts directly in a character’s voice; I wanted to try something new and it helps give more perspective on various settings. This is an excerpt from On The Matters of Sword and Axe, Joan’s eventual Fechtbuch and manual of arms on the new Virtue of

Warhammer Fantasy Characters: Alarielle the Everprincess

Princess Alarielle mostly only appears in canon Warhammer to get murdered and kick off the Nagash Plot of the End Times. This is why she first appeared in the story of Mina Von Carstein, back when the End Times were still coming out, which was an attempt not to waste Nagash being the main villain

The Warhammer Version of A Wizard Repost: Post 7, Conclusion

A Wizard He is just that. He wears a pointed hat So, it should probably be clear I was balancing my run through A Wizard to give the players a reasonable chance at beating him. This is because I think the actual Wizard fight in the original module is sort of one of the weakpoints.

The Warhammer Version of A Wizard Repost: Post 6, Join Hands and Go Forward

A Wizard You join hands, so you are not lost Now, I cut a lot in the 5th floor, because they already knew about the eggs (since they were a burning wreck) and we’d been playing quite awhile. I wanted to accelerate the encounter with the Wizard, since he was trying to kill them and

The Warhammer Version of A Wizard Repost: Post 5, Life Grows Within These Walls

A Wizard Life grows within the womb of these walls. If you harm them, I will rend you apart and set you separate Room 10 is where they almost ran into serious problems. It isn’t really in the adventure outside of the Wizard yelling in bold text that if the players slaughter the Wizardling he’ll

The Warhammer Version of A Wizard Repost: Post 4, The Tower on the Hill

A Wizard Squish squish The moment they made it into the tower they knew something was really, really wrong. The interior of an old watch tower isn’t usually covered in strange growths of blue flesh, nor let by faintly glowing, organic bulbs. The ‘doors’ within were like stretched sphincters of muscle, which opened when someone

The Warhammer Version of A Wizard Repost: Post 3, A Friendly Town

A Wizard A pleasant town I’ll be going over a sort of readthrough of the material, plus how the players approached things and how I adapted it to the system and setting. It’s remarkably easy to adapt! This is one of the strengths of this adventure. A friend who went over it after playing characterized

The Warhammer Version of A Wizard Repost: Post 2, the Heroes

A Wizard Dramatis Personae Alright, now that I’ve got the responsible short review done for people who want to play A Wizard (which I strongly recommend you do, it’s real good) let’s get into how it went and the trip report. I think this is valuable because I think it helps show off how useful

The Warhammer Version of A Wizard Repost, Post 1: An Ordinary Wizard

Since I know SA stuff can’t be read by all my readers, I thought I’d also repost the review/play report of A Wizard, a really interesting horror module. System agnostic, OSR adjacent. Being me, I naturally did it in hams, and it was a very memorable single-session one shot. A Wizard Spoiler Warning This is

Warhammer Thoughts: The Adventurer

I was actually writing something else but while working on it, I got this idea instead: I’d like to talk about one of the core things I enjoy about WHFRP as compared to games like D&D. In D&D settings, adventurers tend to be ‘exalted’ as a social class. Take Forgotten Realms, where everyone important used

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff Update: Theology and Political Concerns in Slaaneshi Doctrines on Addiction

Addiction is a curious thing among Slaaneshi; the core book and other material make it clear that Addiction is considered holy under conventional Slaaneshi chaos worship. The idea that a person is instilled with an overwhelming desire for something that they cannot shake or truly slake and that forces them to seek out more and

Warhammer Character Profile: Sigvald the Magnificent and Utilitarianism

Sigvald, like Manfred, is a character whose canon version is already quite good. He’s a great idea for a Chaos Lord, particularly as the canon stuff gets into one of the most interesting bits of his concept. Unlike most Chaos Lords, Sigvald is free. Slaanesh loves the dude and just wants him to do whatever

Warhammer Fluff: The Challenges of Reform Slaanesh

o, one of the things I’d like to address about the Reformed Slaaneshi: They are important to the story and get a lot of attention, but it’s important to remember they aren’t a major power. Someone like Joan is immensely personally powerful (even without her armor and gear, she can take a hit like an

Warhammer Fluff: 2600s Wizbiz

As a forward to today’s update, I’d like to mention it owes a great deal to the excellent Realms of Sorcery sourcebook in 2e WHFRP. As does Myth. Really, Realms of Sorcery just has excellent fluff and does a good job (generally) of making magic in the Empire weird and messy without an excess of

Warhammer Fluff: The world is changing. Slaanesh is changing. That is how it should be, if Chaos cannot change.

This post authored by kommy! Slaanesh, the Prince of Pleasure and Lord of Excess, is a god (Or goddess. Slaanesh is all genders and none.) with a long and dark history in the Old World. Her nature fundamentally shifted by the events of Joan’s campaign, the pleasure god’s cults are in massive flux in the

Warhammer Fluff: Gundred, Dancing on the Necks of those Below

Gundred was originally a minor god of cattle rustling and banditry, primarily worshipped in the Border Princes and southeastern Empire. He has, however, hit his big break. Handrich worshippers noted that Gundred’s followers enjoyed inflicting terror and pain and making money from doing it, and why, they had money to pay to fellows who would

Warhammer Fluff: Handrich and The March of Profits

Handrich is the God of Commerce, who promises that wealth will trickle down and begs that all of society be aimed at investment. His first temple in Marienburg has become the world’s first international stock market, selling shares in all manner of ventures and investments across the sea and across the Empire. He has grown

Warhammer Fluff Post: Sigmar’s Throne Lies Empty of Those Who Speak For Justice: The Empty Throne Movement of the 2600s

The Empty Throne movement is an internal Sigmarite faction that has never garnered much favor with the Lectors and the Grand Theoganist, though that may be a result of who the Theoganist was for most of the late 2500s and early 2600s. Most of its members are theologians and parish priests, as well as a

Warhammer Fantasy Fluff: GRIMMMMNIRRRRRRRR

I guess dwarfs got a week of their own after all, though it’s much more specifically Warhams Dwarfs and not talking about Dwarfs in general. Though I should probably do a writeup on Myrgard and Stoneheim sometime too. But today I’d like to talk about everyone’s favorite spikey-haired, tattooed blenders, the Slayers. And specifically on

Warhammer Fantasy: Origins and Effects of Dwarven Diaspora

It’s kind of funny; working on dwarf stuff has been fun and shown there’s more I can do with hams dwarfs than I initially thought, which exactly mirrors the process of discovering I enjoyed working with hams elfs. It sort of reminds me of how I used to think I hated cats yet made an

Warhammer Fantasy: Umgak, Frivolity, and Good Solid Dawi Craftdwarfship

I’ve been working on some more dwarf stuff, and thought I’d bring it up here. I have a very long European trip coming up soon so that will probably lead to updates at odd hours from time zones but I’m probably still going to be writing during it, but it’s also messing with my anxiety

The Actual Age of Actual Sigmar: The Wonders of the Dwarfs

While the dwarfs were recovering from their own nightmare at the hands of the Worst Frog and facing continued presses from the orcs and other traditional foes, to the people of the Reik Basin they looked like a superpower. Whole armies clad in wonderous steel and powerful mail. Great halls that shone with gold and

Actual Age of Actual Sigmar: Unberogen Ulricanism

So, we talked about the Teutogens and their henotheism, let’s talk about the Unberogen. We’ll get into the more ‘obscure’ tribes later but I wanted to start with the big two. The Unbergogen were Ulricans, like the Teutogens, but a major difference is that they view Ulric as the chief a tribe or household of

Warhammer of 2600s: Karl Franz der Grosse

Upon its commission, the steamship Karl Franz der Grosse was heralded as the start of a new era for the Old World and beyond. It was no warship, but a passenger ship. It was designed to carry up to a thousand passengers and some cargo to and fro across the ocean. Other ships had carried

The Actual Age of Actual Sigmar: In the sign of Ulric, conquer!: Henotheistic Influence on Teutogen Warmaking and Culture in the Proto-Empire

It’s time to introduce a term that’s very important from my old grad school work on ancient Judaism! Henotheism refers to a religious belief that there may be multiple Gods, but only one God is worthy of worship. It is a concept I think more fantasy settings ought to use, considering the way they often

The Actual Age of Actual Sigmar: Steel isn’t Strong, Boy: Sorcery in an age of Sword and Sorcery

Magic in the ancient world is the same magic you witness in the modern period (still primarily using the Winds, Chaos, etc), but far, far less understood. Most users of magic among the peoples of the Reik Basin and proto-Empire have little to no idea of the theory behind their spells, and would be labeled

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay: Chosen of Asuryan

Here is the final version of my own little sourcebook for the High Elves in Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2E. It’s what I’ve put together after getting tired of just waiting for material for High Elves, including the color and feel of the land to make it a different place to experience and adventure in, including

Warhammer Fluff Update: A True Druchii Has Family

Family is deeply important to the Druchii, on both levels of society. One of Morathi’s programs as Queen (or whatever you call her title this century) has been encouraging them to have children, and without the influence of the Vortex, it’s much easier for Druchii than Asur. Mind, without the influence of Ulthuan, raising children

Warhammer Fluff Update: Character Profile, Sophia of L’Anguille

Sophia of L’Anguille is the daughter of Joan of Lyonesse and M’Kari’Cha’La, the first child of their marriage. Born nine years after the events of Joan’s story, when ‘Johanna of L’Anguille’ (successful merchant of sorts, Herald of Slaanesh, bankroller of missionaries and other cultists) finally got over her worries about raising a child. Partly thanks

Warhammer Fluff Update: The Host of Naggaroth

The host of the Druchii is feared throughout the Old World, according to the Druchii. Officers will call their units things like “Bleakswords” and tell you of how all their swordselfs are dashing duelists who are masters of the blade and each believe they’re the finest warrior in the world. This wouldn’t be news to

Warhammer Fluff Update: The Bloody Hand

Khaine is the chief god of the Druchii interpretation of the Elven pantheon. In most Elven societies, Khaine is a God of last resort, with small numbers of shrines and followers. This is on account of his portfolio: While it is normally translated as ‘The God of Murder’ from Eltharin, it has a much more

Warhammer Fluff: Oh Give Me A Home Where The Chaos Moose Roam

The Shades are a subject of plenty of fiction and mythology in Naggaroth. These are the Druchii who neither live in the cities nor the plantations and ‘developed’ rural areas, the Dark Elfs of the frontier. Many are descendants of outlaws and exiles defeated in this or that power struggle who managed to found successful-enough

Warhammer Fluff: Dark Canada

The Druchii. One of the most centralized, personalized, and authoritarian states in Warhams. Yes, even moreso than the Chaos Dwarfs, considering they’re an insane mess of priests, officials, businessdwarfs, and military officials. In Naggaroth, all roads eventually lead to one place and that place is Malekith the Witch King. For five thousand years, he has

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 28

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones What Went Wrong So the Thousand Thrones is not a good campaign. It’s railroaded to hell, has tons of chapters where nothing happens, has very wonky balance, and ends in a huge dungeon crawl full of BS against a foe that the PCs don’t really have a lot of

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 27

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Epilogue They had been through an awful lot. From saving Talabheim and revealing the existence of the Skaven to the Empire at large, to destroying a two century old Chaos Champion they had no idea about, to killing the considerably fewer centuries old Chaos Champion they DID know about,

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 26

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones The Giant Space Witch From Nowhere PurpleXVI posted: Like, randomly rolling a mutation at chargen? Fine, you can wrap your character concept around it. Randomly rolling one in play? The only way I could see handling it would be rolling up a multiple-choice of non-character-destroying mutations behind the sheet,

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 25

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones It Wishes It Was The Darkest Dungeon The final dungeon is one of the worst parts of this campaign. It isn’t quite as bad as Chapter 5 overall, but this should be the big climax. In Ashes of Middenheim, the Knight Fight was off in balance but the players

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 24

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Chapter Content Warning The Second Hey, guess who’s coming back? It wasn’t just Sexual Assault Filth Witch, but our more general old friend Sexual Menace As A Plot Device. So the general outline of what happens in the village is that Tobias’s Chaos Organ has become a big sickness

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 23

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones The Gang Travels Kislev First, the customary 300 EXP an adventure for our protagonists has some significant effects. Shanna finishes Crime Lord and scampers directly into Master Thief. She can finally upgrade her Agi again! And by the end of the campaign she’ll have maxed it at 89%. Ain’t

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 22

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Let’s Talk Deepest Lore You know the big reason all the Deepest Lore about Nagash being a God and shit rubs me the wrong way in this chapter? It isn’t just that it feels off from what I know of the setting and kind of out of left field.

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 21

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Calculate your traveling expenses and bathe in DEEP LORES So why were our heroes in Talabheim anyway? Well, the day after the insane play, Karl got kidnapped again. That’s just how he does; little guy’s like Princess Peach. Except this time he wasn’t kidnapped at all. This time he

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 20

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones After Nazis So, the book suggests inserting Terror in Talabheim here if you own it. And you know, I did just review it. It also suggests PCs should be ‘finishing their 2nd Career’ at the beginning of Chapter 7. I want to point out this is a terrible way

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 19

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones ACTING (Also investigation) So, before they can get to the passion play, the heroes have to solve a murder. This is surprisingly straightforward. Two of the leads they have are false, but lead to short mini-adventures, one is correct and leads directly to the real culprits. What they see

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 18

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Relatively Inoffensive Chapter 6 takes place near Wolfenburg, the capitol of Ostland. Remembering from Sigmar’s Heirs, Wolfenburg did not have a good time in the Storm. It was right in the path of Archy’s march to Middenheim, and while it had its own walls and troops, Ostland is one

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 17

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Waylaid By Bullshit The entire back yard is full of traps that I don’t understand why they think you’d spring. For instance, the Rookery is full of caged up birbs. If you pick the lock or otherwise unleash the obviously evil, glaring, partly mutated birbs, they attack you, doing

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 16

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Evil Mansions So our heroes get to Ansel’s old house in Ruhrhoff. Ruhrhoff is not in good condition. Like a lot of Ostland, it got smashed by the Chaos army that was sweeping through to lose at Middenheim. Somehow, Ansel’s old home is still standing, and when the heroes

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 15

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Chapter Content Warning Chapter 5 is not going to be a nice time for anyone. I should note I probably came off as too flippant in my last update about Ansel being a sexual predator. It’s just that’s his entire story and it makes me angry. A guy who

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 14

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones We wuz too late, the Vengeance already saw the Comet! Welcome to Altdorf. It’s going to be a long and extremely shitty stay as the PCs chase after the open Nurglite cultist to rescue a magic child from his clutches. For the sake of not wasting too much of

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 13

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Just The Worst Okay, Chapter 4 isn’t the worst. There are worse parts. Chapter 4 is the most boring. Literally nothing the PCs do during Chapter 4 has any effect on the actual plot. Any attempt at alternate actions or preventing any upcoming BS will be met by ‘and

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 12

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: The Thousand Thrones Champion of Karl So, our heroes are at a major crossroad. Even if they wanted to stop the campaign at this point, Johan and Sif are currently enamored with a 9 year old boy. Sif calls him Better Sigmar to the annoyance of basically everyone in the Crusade.

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 11

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones What do you mean you’re not up for child murder Are you up for some child murder? The adventure certainly hopes so, because the majority of the assumed material here relies on the players trying to help some elves kill a nine year old boy (which they fail at

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 10

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Waylaid By Jackassery Is An Evergreen Post Title Sif and Oleg are on watch, talking about lutefisk and plump helmets and how little Sif misses the former and how much Oleg misses the latter, when they hear something coming from the courtyard of the inn. Some silly bastard put

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 9

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones A nice walk, spoiled Bookkeeping first: Everyone has a little money, but nowhere to spend it, so gear doesn’t change any. With the customary 300 EXP, Sif picks up 2 Wounds and 5 Agi, in hopes she won’t get so fucked up in the next fights. Katarine got a

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 8

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Wrong Wilhelm So having completed their fetch quest, the heroes go to talk to the Reeve. He’s an insufferable asshole who tries to bluster like a living thesaurus, and for once, the solution really is to just punch him in the face. For one, the Warhammer Cops/30 Armed Men/12

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 7

I Suspect The Omi Alliance tankfish posted: When I ran the thousands thrones I ended up making the chicken the mayor. The backstory being the original lord used a little used law to avoid taxes put Nugget the 1st in charge. Over a few generations the chicken mayor is now the villages pride and joy.

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 6

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Arise Chicken First off, the heroes have upgraded some but I won’t be posting their full sheets every time they get EXP or anything, just when they promote. Because the promotion guidelines for the chapters don’t actually fit with the EXP awards they give, because this book keeps telling

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 5

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones There Is Nothing You Can Do For The Abused Spouse So the clues they have lead to the worst part of town, near the sewage runoffs. Being a Nurglite cult, Baer’s buddies obviously hid down in the sewers with all the shit. There’s a community around the “Dead Canal”

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 4

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Swampfight! SWAMPFIGHT! Hey, it’s our first major combat section of the game. One of the other things I generally notice in Thousand Thrones is how long everything is. Nothing is ever ‘let’s get this simple bit out of the way to get on to the main event’. Everything is

Thousand Thrones Reupload Part 3

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: The Thousand Thrones It offered the most money So our heroes come out of the tavern where they spent a not-inconsiderable amount of their money establishing their new fellowship by partying and getting to know one another. They missed the events of the last day or two thanks to their pub

Thousand Thrones Re-Upload Part 2

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: Thousand Thrones Marienburgers Because there’s space for 5 characters with the 5 roles, we’re getting every single species this time. A Halfling Criminal, a Dwarf Ranger, an Elf Academic, a Human Commoner, and a Human (Norse) Warrior, made using the Norse rules in Tome of Corruption because it’s by the same

Thousand Thrones Re-Upload Part 1

Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 2e: The Thousand Thrones You’re gonna have a bad time I think this is no shit the worst module in Warhammer. Thousand Thrones commits almost every sin it’s possible to commit in writing a Warhammer adventure. It’s poorly balanced (It is entirely possible to have to fight 4 vampires, at once, as

Lustria Fluff: The Slaan

The Slaan were pre-designed, long before coming to the colony at Heaven. As has been mentioned before, the Old Ones have never been able to develop truly sapient magical or mechanical constructs. Any time the Old Ones deploy a ‘true’ AI, it is a biological construct or an imprisoned Old One sentenced to the harshest

Lustria Update: Lustrian Equipment

Lustria has its own special equipment, based around the unusual circumstances and military technology employed by both the Lizardmen and the Amazons. Much of it falls under a single umbrella proficiency, as the weapons are much more ‘sidegrade’ weapons and something of a mishmash, so this represents the general weapons training of an Amazon, Saurus,

Warhammer Character Profile: Luther Huss

                Huss is a fascinating character. I’ve looked up what I can about his official character and it’s insane that you’re meant to like this man. He is meant to be depicted as a harsh, but inspiring reformer who opposes the weakness and decadence of his cult and tries to push it to fight hard

Warhams Thoughts: The Victimhood of the Peoples of Chaos

So, you might be wondering why Wil has bogged down some. This is because writing a story about Kislev right now is a little difficult, considering current events; I’ll get to it in a bit, but for now I’m going to be focusing more on general setting writing. Besides, I’ve been enjoying doing it. So

Warhammer Fluff Update: Beastmen Basics

The Beastmen. The eternal jobbers of Chaos, forever serving it and getting stomped on so that the actual Warriors and other forces can come off better. There’s an interesting bit of meta-history in the Beastmen, namely in that they were originally going to be much more prominent and vicious in Warhammer (and pretty inspired by

Wilhelm Metzger Update: Arrival in Praag

As they rode up on Praag, Bianka took Wil aside to make it pointedly clear: There weren’t that many people in the northern Oblast outside of the city. And there were two Thralls to feed. He absolutely could not get up to some daring adventure that would see them tossed out of this city in

Lustria Fluff: Holder of the Royal Laser Cannon

Fuck it, let’s have some more fitness madness. I’m dealing with a problem with my hands that is making typing a bit tougher (some mixups with getting my anti-arthritis medication, hopefully to be sorted soon) so I’m just kinda writing whatever the hell I feel like for the next bit. So let’s talk about Amazon

Lustria Fluff: Amazon Slavery

One more Lustria Post before we go back to Wil, today we’re going to be talking about a more sensitive topic. Namely, the tradition of slavery and the way it gets much worse (not that it was ever good) over the 2500s/2600s in Lustria. I understand this parallels some serious historical issues, including one of

Lustria Fluff: Amazon Religion and Magic

This is a posting of notes I had towards my own Lustria book. They would probably see some adjustment (specifically in which Arcane/Divine spells get mixed together and reflavored for their unusual Lores; they get a few too many spells at moment) but the basic principles are here! The Amazons worship the aspects of the

Elf Only Island: A Draft Of Chosen of Asuryan

So, while we’ve been traveling, my longtime friend, GM, and co-author kommy decided to spend a lot of time working on their own elf book. I’ve been saying we’d do this, and so here it is! I think a lot of it came out quite well so far. There will probably be more added to

Lustria Stuff: Amazon Careers, or Martial Arts Is Justice

Well, I don’t have my mechanical notes on them with me so I can’t give the direct stats, but I thought I’d give a sampling of what the Amazon Careers are like fluff wise and how they fit into things. The simplest is Huntress, a Basic career for Amazon soldiers who have just joined a

Warhammer Fluff Update: State Your First Name, Last Name, and Occupation. Lizardman, Lizardman, and Lizardman.

I’ve been promising our scaley friends for a long time, so it’s finally time for the Lizardmen’s basic profile. Note, this is the Lizardmen, not the Slaan. So Skinks and Saurus and such. Kroxigor too but they’re a little less PC-friendly (just because they’re massive and very physically powerful and it can be tough to

Warhammer Fluff Update: Visit Lustria, Where Only 95% of the Plants Can Somehow Kill You

Lustria: A land where the plants are trying to kill you, the dinosaurs are biological drones left behind by aliens, and the primary human nation is an Aztec-Norse fusion of cheerfully optimistic fitness nuts worshipping their own conception of what the ancient aliens must have been like. It’s an exciting place. And quite important to